i'm already home sick.

photos by E


and i haven't even left yet.

he wondered how we know that what happens to us isn't good.

The Man in Bogata by Amy Hempel

The police and emergency service people fail to make a dent. The voice of the pleading spouse does not have the hoped-for effect. The woman remains on the ledge - though not, she threatens, for long.

I imagine that I am the one who must talk the woman down. I see it, and it happens like this.

I tell the woman about a man in Bogota. He was a wealthy man, an industrialist who was kidnapped and held for ransom. It was not a TV drama; his wife would not call the bank and, in twenty-four hours, have one million dollars. It took months. The man had a heart condition, and the kidnappers had to keep the man alive.

Listen to this, I tell the woman on the ledge. His captors made him quit smoking. They changed his diet and made him exercise every day. They held him that way for three months.

When the ransom was paid and the man was released, the doctor looked him over. He found the man to be in excellent health. I tell the woman what the doctor said then - that the kidnap was the best thing to happen to that man.

Maybe this is not a come-down-from-the-ledge story. But I tell it with the thought that the woman on the ledge will ask herself a question, the question that occurred to that man in Bogota.

He wondered how we know that what happens to us isn't good.

i'm still here.

i've been spending a lot of time just like this:


Photo by E
i'm glad i have Marley girl around, because i'd be pretty lonely these days without her.

i will find a way to you if it kills me

cinco de mayo. while everyone gorges themselves on Carlito's food, I'm reflecting. 25 days from graduation and I'm finally EXCITED. i may not have quite everything figured out, but i know i am finally okay with that.

this year has been one of major changes, big transitions, and hard lessons. i'm finally developing a personal style in my photography and i love shooting more and more everyday. how lucky am i to do something in my life that makes me so happy?

two of my photos were chosen to be in the annual silverworks open studio gallery show, and i finally felt like an ARTIST.

i lost a dear friend, and made a few more. losing logan was one of the most terrible things that has ever happened to me, and to my friends. however, with all the tears we all still cry, we've learned some hard lessons. we know now that our time here on earth is short, and that we should never ever take each other for granted. i notice things about life because of logan that i never would have before. i look to the sky everytime it rains, everytime the sunshines, every time i witness even the smalles miracle, i know there is someone looking down on us. my friend and i were in my kitchen sharing memories about logan and got pretty emotional and upset, and all of a sudden, our favorite (and rediculous!) 80s song came on my iTunes, and we just burst into laughter. normally, that would have been just funny, but now we know that its a SIGN from our friend.

i graduate in a few days, and then i'm off to Atlanta to live with 2 of my best friends in the world, Brandon and Jake. I'm excited to live with two creative people who truly make me happy no matter what. I'm excited to hear Brandon and Jake play their guitars all day and night and have some pretty insane adventures. i'm also excited to be in a metropolitan city and start working.


just because i'm graduating doesn't mean i'm going to stop learning lessons. this is only the beginning.