i'm already home sick.

photos by E


and i haven't even left yet.

he wondered how we know that what happens to us isn't good.

The Man in Bogata by Amy Hempel

The police and emergency service people fail to make a dent. The voice of the pleading spouse does not have the hoped-for effect. The woman remains on the ledge - though not, she threatens, for long.

I imagine that I am the one who must talk the woman down. I see it, and it happens like this.

I tell the woman about a man in Bogota. He was a wealthy man, an industrialist who was kidnapped and held for ransom. It was not a TV drama; his wife would not call the bank and, in twenty-four hours, have one million dollars. It took months. The man had a heart condition, and the kidnappers had to keep the man alive.

Listen to this, I tell the woman on the ledge. His captors made him quit smoking. They changed his diet and made him exercise every day. They held him that way for three months.

When the ransom was paid and the man was released, the doctor looked him over. He found the man to be in excellent health. I tell the woman what the doctor said then - that the kidnap was the best thing to happen to that man.

Maybe this is not a come-down-from-the-ledge story. But I tell it with the thought that the woman on the ledge will ask herself a question, the question that occurred to that man in Bogota.

He wondered how we know that what happens to us isn't good.

i'm still here.

i've been spending a lot of time just like this:


Photo by E
i'm glad i have Marley girl around, because i'd be pretty lonely these days without her.

i will find a way to you if it kills me

cinco de mayo. while everyone gorges themselves on Carlito's food, I'm reflecting. 25 days from graduation and I'm finally EXCITED. i may not have quite everything figured out, but i know i am finally okay with that.

this year has been one of major changes, big transitions, and hard lessons. i'm finally developing a personal style in my photography and i love shooting more and more everyday. how lucky am i to do something in my life that makes me so happy?

two of my photos were chosen to be in the annual silverworks open studio gallery show, and i finally felt like an ARTIST.

i lost a dear friend, and made a few more. losing logan was one of the most terrible things that has ever happened to me, and to my friends. however, with all the tears we all still cry, we've learned some hard lessons. we know now that our time here on earth is short, and that we should never ever take each other for granted. i notice things about life because of logan that i never would have before. i look to the sky everytime it rains, everytime the sunshines, every time i witness even the smalles miracle, i know there is someone looking down on us. my friend and i were in my kitchen sharing memories about logan and got pretty emotional and upset, and all of a sudden, our favorite (and rediculous!) 80s song came on my iTunes, and we just burst into laughter. normally, that would have been just funny, but now we know that its a SIGN from our friend.

i graduate in a few days, and then i'm off to Atlanta to live with 2 of my best friends in the world, Brandon and Jake. I'm excited to live with two creative people who truly make me happy no matter what. I'm excited to hear Brandon and Jake play their guitars all day and night and have some pretty insane adventures. i'm also excited to be in a metropolitan city and start working.


just because i'm graduating doesn't mean i'm going to stop learning lessons. this is only the beginning.

you'll be on my mind

A few days ago, I looked through all of your photos on facebook and trying really hard to hang on to every memory I have of you. I came across this photo:

and, just like when you were here with us, you made me smile so big. I've seen this photo so many times, but this time, I noticed something different. Call me crazy, but seeing you in a Brandon Clark t-shirt really made my day. I realized that you and I shared something on Earth that I didn't really know we did. I showed this picture to Brandon, and it did the same for him. I hope you know that we think about you every day, we talk to you and I hope you hear it. Although you are gone for now, we are still learning things about you from the stories that we tell to each other. I know that you are making the world sunnier from heaven, and we're keeping it clean here on Earth, just like you want it to be. We love you, Logan. Happy 19th Birthday, friend.

follow your heart.

Photo by E


This is the loneliest of times for a human, I think. This is also the time that humans CHOOSE to be lonely, which I think is the hardest part of the story. This is the time where you have to decide where your life is going to lead you. One of the only chances you really have to "start over". In a month, I graduate from SCAD. I, for the most part, can pack my things and move ANYWHERE I want. Obviously, having the means to pay my rent and (eek!) my student loans is going to limit me to where I end up, but that is only a small piece of the puzzle. Do I want to migrate with my friends? How far from my family should I be? There are a million questions to consider, and there are not a million days to decide.

Photo by E

My room is clean. And it feels glorious. There is really nothing better then coming home to a clean, organized, sweet smelling room. Having this new computer has changed my life, no matter how crazy how it sounds. I sit at my desk and do HOMEwork at HOME now, instead of Bergan. Marley likes having me home, although I think she's just excited its warm enough to open the windows again. Fresh air, fresh room. Love.

Photo by E

I also got a chance to hear B. Clark and the Justice today at band practice, and they are moving along quite well. I can't believe how far they have gone already. I remember the very first time I ever saw Brandon play (the first time i met him!). I knew he was great then, but he doesn't even sound like the same person any more. I love being proud of my friends, and seeing them truly happy.


We also did a celebrity shoot, which didn't turn out quite how i had hoped, but I got some good shots. The McLovin shot was the best of the celebrities, but I'm quite fond of this shot. He was supposed to be John Mayer, but the shot is pretty cool regardless of his similarities to the man himself.

Photo by E

shooting the dog

Photo by E
calm down, calm down. puppy photo shoot, no guns in this house.

busy busy

I have been so busy, sadly, too busy for my blog.


But no longer!

...Well...I'm still busy. However, my blog will not die.

My friends left for the whole weekend this past weekend and I realized how hard it is really going to be to leave them after we all graduate.

Another factor playing into my neglect of this blog has been my lack of a computer. Good news:

My brand new beautiful Macbook Pro came in the mail on Friday, and I am currently connected to the real world 24-7. It's glorious.

this will happen more i swear.

i hope you know you are loved.

we lost an amazing friend this weekend. logan we will always remember those blue eyes, your amazing sense of humor, and your happy, bright face. you are our friend, forever.